By Victor L. Midyett
I believe that throughout our entire life, no matter how many birthdays we have, life offers us opportunities to change and grow.
Have you ever said something to someone and been totally taken aback and surprised at their reaction, or “come back,” to the point that you were left wondering, Where did that come from?
I have observed over the years that people react this way for two main and opposite reasons. It is either because of the truth or a lie.
First, consider getting caught in a lie. (Tone it down if you wish and call it a fib, but let’s be honest: it is still a lie.) Generally in sports and in war, it is accepted that the best defense is a strong offense. When caught in a lie, some people will go on the offensive and slam the other person in a personal way that usually has nothing to do with the original subject matter (or with what the other person said). The slam can then start a completely separate branch of argument, if it is allowed to continue – if neither person is willing to shut up.
My personal conclusion is that defending oneself by going on the offensive serves no constructive purpose other than to create a diversion.
Second, being told a truth can have the same result when the person being told it isn’t willing to accept it. Rejected truths about ourselves are involved in every piece of “baggage” we have carried since a young age.
Picture little Johnny with chocolate icing and crumbs all around his mouth when his mom asks, “Johnny, did you eat my chocolate cake?” With learned confidence and hopeful defiance he loudly replies, “No!”
This, in my lay opinion, is a false defensive posture that actually hinders little Johnny’s (or our own) growth and development into a maturing, loving, and caring human being. If someone else makes a constructive comment about us that we are not willing to consider, let alone accept, we tend to lash out in a manner that may surprise the other person – and even perhaps ourselves. Does it change the truth? I think not.
I have said this before, and I say it again: Truth does not alter according to our willingness to accept it. [The original post about this principle, “Truth: It does not alter,” was published on November 3, 2015.]
I challenge us all to consider and ask ourselves this: Am I willing to be truthful with myself in pursuit of my own healthy growth and fulfilment as an effective and loving human being?
Our communications and meaningful interactions in society will surely be so much better served if we do, don’t you think?
Caution: This “revisitation” stemmed from an altercation that arose between offspring and has nothing whatsoever to do with our current political environment.
| Copyright © 2018 by Victor L. Midyett |
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